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DATING IN U.S. & JAPAN.
Term Paper ID:19549
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Essay Subject:
Compares gender roles & expectations. Results of interviews with male & female from U.S. & Japan.... More...
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7 Pages / 1575 Words
8 sources, 17 Citations,
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Paper Abstract:
Compares gender roles & expectations. Results of interviews with male & female from U.S. & Japan.
Paper Introduction:
This study will consider how gender roles are enforced in dating in the United States and Japan. In addition to reviewing some of the literature on the topic, this paper will include responses from interviews conducted with four people. The four people interviewed were a female and a male from the United States, and a female and a male from Japan.
This topic is of interest because gender roles help define the status of the people who make up a particular society. In both the United States and Japan, men are generally given the role of earning a living and providing an income for the family. By contrast, the women in both countries are usually given the role of raising children and caring for the home. These facts raise a number of questions regarding the impact of gender roles on society. For example, do the women of the United States and
Text of the Paper:
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The people chosen for the questioningwere all currently in relationships and were all dating on a regular basisat the time. Bonhaker, W. Male/femaleroles: Opposing viewpoints. Culture influences gender roles. New York: Truman Talley.----------------------- 1 (199 ). The Americanmale said that he and his girlfriend would try to reach a mutual agreementon where to go. O'Neill,eds. Nevertheless, Japanese youth are similar to their Americancounterparts in that they are often very curious about sex. New York: Ballantine. (1988). Both the Japanese female and the Japanese male simplystated that it was the man's job to decide where to go. In Japan, it is strongly believed that a woman's only role is to carefor her home and children, and to tend to her husband's needs (Bohnaker,199 , p. Thethird question was "Who usually pays for the dates?" The American femaleindicated that she liked to take turns with her boyfriend in paying fordates, and that they often shared costs. Middletown: Wesleyan UP. Both the Japanese and the American male acceptedtheir own gender roles; however, the Japanese male expresseddissatisfaction with the idea of change in traditional female roles.Overall, it can be said that the Japanese have further to go in terms ofbringing about equality for women. Both the Japanese female and the Japanese male answeredthat the man always pays for their dates. Blau & Ferber (1989) have pointed out that this situationresults in most American women being dependent upon their mates. The Japanese male was happy with his owngender; however, he also stated that he felt Japanese women had too muchfreedom already. On the surface, it would appear that gender roles are more stronglyenforced in Japan than they are in the United States. SanDiego: Gulliver. Eight questions pertaining to gender and dating were asked.The first question, "How did you meet?" was answered in a variety of ways.The American female stated that she met her boyfriend through a mutualfriend. (1989). 1 ). As in Japan, American children aresocialized in their respective roles from a very early age (Doyle, 1989, p.32). In contrast to the American way, high schoolstudents in Japan are rarely permitted to go out on dates (Meyer, 1988, p.12 ). The primary concern in dating is simply to finda suitable mate for marriage. One of the most strikingdifferences between U.S. From an early age, Japanese girls are conditioned to besubmissive and passive. For example, do the women of the United Statesand Japan accept their domestic roles in life? According to Bohnaker (199 ), Japanese women feel that their"duty" is to care for the home; just as the "duty" of the Japanese man isto make a living and provide an income for the family (pp. San Diego:Greenhaven, pp. As such, the slightly improved conditionfor American women has come about only because the women have been takingthe initiative to fight for their own rights. In this study, emphasis will be placed on thequestion of how gender is enforced in the United States and Japan. In this way, the gender rolesof American women are often reinforced through dating behaviors. K. San Diego: Greenhaven, pp. In this study, a questionnaire was given to four young people - aJapanese male and female and an American male and female - in order todetermine the extent to which gender stereotypes are enforced throughdating in their respective cultures. (1981). O'Neill, eds. Nevertheless, gender rolesare very strong in the United States. In addition to reviewing some of theliterature on the topic, this paper will include responses from interviewsconducted with four people. The American male said he met his girlfriend at school. The Japanese femaleclaimed that love and romance are important; however, she also indicatedthat compatibility is more important. By contrast, Japanese boys are "brought up tobelieve in masculine superiority" (Meyer, 1988, p. In both the United Statesand Japan, men are generally given the role of earning a living andproviding an income for the family. Only the American female was consistent in denying thesestereotypical claims. TheJapanese female, on the other hand, answered with a definite "no." TheJapanese male answered that premarital sex was acceptable to him but thathe would not marry a woman who would engage in such behavior. Both seem to be happy with the system and are not struggling tobring about immediate change. Family and social network: Roles, norms, andexternal relationships in ordinary urban families. The American male simply answered "yes" to this question. In both cultures, premarital sex was more likely tobe initiated by the male than the female. Bott, E. Arrangedmarriages are not forced as they were in the past; nevertheless, theinitial meeting of a potential couple is often "suggested and prepared by ago-between" (Tasker, 1988, p. and Japanese youth. In the United States, love andromance were considered to be important factors in a relationship. For the most part, the answers given by the respondents support whatwas claimed in the literature about gender in the United States and Japan.Although gender stereotypes are somewhat stronger in Japan, they arenonetheless also very strong in the United States. 272). The second question was "Who initiates the dates?" The Americanfemale said that sometimes her boyfriend initiated dates and at other timesshe would ask him out. 22). In the United States, women have moreflexibility in terms of making decisions for themselves. Philadelphia: Institute for the Study ofHuman Issues, pp. The fifth questionwas "Does it matter who earns more money in a successful relationship -male or female?" The American woman answered "no." Both the American maleand the Japanese female, on the other hand, answered "yes." Specifically,they both felt that the man should earn more money than the woman. Thiscan be seen in the case of the American female, who met her boyfriendthrough a mutual friend. InJapan, both males and females simply accept their traditional stereotypicalroles. Hehad been through several arranged introductions before, but none of themhad worked out to his satisfaction. Bernards & T. The Japanese male also claimed that heconsidered this an unusual way to meet a prospective marriage partner. In thisregard, it can be seen that gender conditioning in both nations begins at avery early age. Grossberg, ed. As in theUnited States, it is the Japanese boy rather than the girl who usuallytries to initiate sex (Meyer, 1988, p. The seventhquestion was "How important is love and romance in a successfulrelationship?" The American woman claimed that such qualities are veryimportant. 166). D., Williams, C. E. This can be seen in the case of the Japanese male who met hisgirlfriend at work. When compared with the Japanese, it wouldseem that Americans tolerate more variety in terms of sex roles. Iwao, S. In sharp contrast to the American way,"ideas of romance and companionship in marriage seem irrelevant to mostJapanese" (Meyer, 1988, p. Bernards & T. By contrast, the American male, Japanese female andJapanese male all answered that the man always initiated their dates. A. 3). 273). Also, are such sex rolesnormal and biological or do they represent an unfair claim to power by themen of the two nations? 138). Thus, some American couples are moreflexible in terms of gender roles than others. In the sixth question, the respondents were asked to indicate theirfeelings on premarital sex. However, because both men and womentend to work today, she felt that the man should take more responsibilityin the domestic area. In adating relationship, American women "may be put on a pedestal, protected,and sheltered" (Blau & Ferber, 1989, p. In this regard, "there is more emphasis on acomplementary relationship between the couple than on sharing feelings andactivities" (Iwao, 1981, p. Klassen, A. This study will seek todetermine the cross-cultural differences and similarities in the datingpatterns of U.S. He indicated that he would notlet his wife work once he was married. J., & Levitt, E. If the couple does not like oneanother, they will not continue dating beyond the initial meeting.However, if they do like each other, "they will continue to date; if theirrelationship grows closer they may fall in love and eventually marry"(Iwao, 1981, p. A voice from Japan: An outsider looks in. In her opinion, "love grows overtime" in a relationship. A. This topic is of interest because gender roles help define the statusof the people who make up a particular society. 4 -47. Doyle, J. The American male claimed that it"depends on the circumstances." However, he also said that he felt thatthe man should usually pay for the dates, especially in the early stages ofthe relationship. In terms of how dating couples meet, it is interestingto note that meetings are sometimes "arranged" in the United States. The eighth and final question was: "Are you happy with your gender? Thus, "females have often complied with this system inthat, ideally, it does provide rewards such as security, leisure, andstatus" (Klassen, Williams, & Levitt, 1989, p. 39). The Japanese female said she was happy being awoman; however, she also claimed that she hoped for more freedom forJapanese women in the future. The feminine perspective in Japan today. 18-19). 31-39. Tasker (1988) notes that "the participation of women inJapanese society is much less advanced than in other rich countries" (p.99). The passivity ofJapanese women is accentuated by the fact that they openly accept theirrole in life. 16-27. However, as thequestionnaire indicates, the American male had no particular intention ofgiving up his superior position. Sex andmorality in the U.S.: An empirical enquiry under the auspices of theKinsey Institute. Are there things you would like tochange?" The American female answered that everything would be fine if theworld was still a traditional place. The females in both countries were accepting of theirgender roles; however, they both indicated that they hoped for conditionsto improve in the future. 47). (1989). As in thecase of Japanese women, American women have for the most part acceptedtheir role in life. The United States is not far different from Japan in that womenare often treated as the "property" of men (Klassen, Williams, & Levitt,1989, p. The response of the Japanese male was remarkablysimilar to that of the Japanese female. Although he met his current girlfriend at work, he didnot really like the idea of her working. A. References Blau, F. In both cultures, themale usually initiates the dates. Male/female roles: Opposing viewpoints. As in Japan, Americans generally believe that the woman's role is tohave children and care for the home, whereas the male "should shun actingfeminine, be a success, be aggressive when the occasion warrants it, be theinitiator in sexual relations, and be self-reliant and tough" (Bott, 1971,p. Meyer, C. Despite the women's liberation movement, gender roles are also verystrong in the United States. Economics determines genderroles. Although thesituation is rapidly changing, Japanese women are still bound bytraditional views. 26). When the boys and girls reach dating age, gender roles arefurther enforced through dating behaviors. Tasker, P. However, he indicated that he could imagine dating a woman whosefamily was wealthier than his. However, it is important to note that the Japaneseconception of "falling in love" does not usually correspond with that ofthe United States. In addition, the male usually pays forthe date and decides where he and his partner should go. The answers given by theAmerican female in the questionnaire tend to support this conclusion. N. The hollow doll: A little box of Japaneseshocks. (1989). The four people interviewed were a female anda male from the United States, and a female and a male from Japan. Japantoday. Often, Japanese couples will have very few dates, evenif they like one another. Bycontrast, the Japanese respondents placed more emphasis on "practicality"in a relationship. However, strengths and weaknesses canbe seen in the gender attitudes of both the Japanese and the Americans. The Japanese male claimed that he met hiscurrent girlfriend at his job. These facts raise a number of questions regarding the impact ofgender roles on society. (1988). Furthermore, in Japan, meetings were not alwaysarranged. TheJapanese female indicated that an older relative had arranged the firstmeeting with her boyfriend. D., & Ferber, M. The Japanese: A major exploration of modernJapan. By contrast, the women in bothcountries are usually given the role of raising children and caring for thehome. The American male said that they were important, but he placedless emphasis on them than the American female did. Compared with Americans, there are many differences to be seen in theway that the Japanese date. In both cultures,there is the common belief that the male should earn more money than thewoman. The fourth question was "Whodecides where to go on date?" The American female indicated that she andher boyfriend usually take turns in deciding where to go. TheJapanese male also stated that the man should make more money than thewoman. and Japanese dating patterns is the fact thatJapanese couples are often introduced through arranged meetings. New York: TheFree Press. 177). The American male indicated that he was perfectlyhappy with his gender. 2nd ed. Bott(1971), for example, found "considerable variation in the role-relationshipbetween husband and wife" (p. N. 22). (1971). F. This study will consider how gender roles are enforced in dating inthe United States and Japan. The American woman said that premarital sexwas alright as long as both people in the relationship were in love witheach other.
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